Moving into Mutuality

“Do not waste what remains of your life in speculating about your neighbors, unless with a view to some mutual benefit.”  by Marcus Aurelius (April 121 to March 180)

I recommend re-reading the wise words of Marcus Aurelius and this time replace the word “neighbors” with “colleagues”. It would be stated as, do not waste what remains of your life in speculating about your colleagues, unless with a view to some mutual benefit.

As we enter a new season of this pandemic I am witnessing themes that encircle mutuality and this includes reciprocity, cooperation, and mutual benefit. You might say, the need for moving into mutuality keeps popping up. It’s making its presence known and is doing so by weaving its way into our professional conversations.

Our challenge may begin by putting an end to speculating and instead replacing this investment of time and energy by asking ourselves how we will put an end to this habit? We could also invite one another to put our heads together and create mutually beneficial solutions and approaches.

We grow when we realize we may need to actively change our points of view. We advance results when we make the decision to consciously reflect and “cause the pause” in order to pivot away from our drama dynamics. Speculating about our colleagues often transpires without thought. It can become habitual, especially when working remote. For some it may even be enticing or a way to avoid our own stuff by pointing out what’s not working well with or for someone else. These tendencies may be laced into both our inner dialogue as well as how we commiserate via normalized complaining, blaming, persecution, or harsh judgements and opinions. Sadly, these only re-ignite drama-making behaviors, thus speculations evolve and spiral. 

Decide today you will invest in a spring cleaning, so to speak. Commit to be on the watch for making a change, one that will support trust and your ability for moving into a place of mutuality. Let go of the drama, instead engage approaches, attitudes, communication, recommendations and solutions that are mutually beneficial. Consider it a leadership or professional development opportunity. Practice with whatever topic you may be analyzing, sharing, communicating about, or developing a solution for as one that requires a response which incorporates a mutual benefit for all concerned. After all this is truly the art of collaboration at work. Collaboration requires a commitment to cooperation and seeking solutions that will provide mutual benefit.

Allow the energy of Spring to inspire you in embracing your part necessary for moving into mutuality.  

Energize your life and work with Promoting Brilliance. Contact Beth Wellesley at 612.325.5104 or

Photo by Anna Shvets from Pexels to honor this last day of March 2021 and in celebration of Women’s History Month.